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About Deviant Member noNetherlands Groups :iconcontion-verse: Contion-Verse
 
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Het maakt toch niks uit. Ik heb het al opgegeven. Ik weet het heus wel ... dat ik overbodig ben. Ik heb net een besluit genomen. Het is niet erg. Ik verdwijn gewoon.\


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If you're not up for reading yet another personal journal, kindly direct yourself away from this one. 

Doing pretty bad these days. I'm too tired to stand up for myself when it's needed and it's hurting me.
I rather lay in bed all day then get up and eat something. I lost my concentration again too.

I can't draw digitally because my tablet cord snapped so I have to slowly save up for another. 

It honestly feels like the walls are slowly coming down on me. 
And these thoughts, they won't stop.
Even though I kinda know it's not true it's still a sort of reality for me.

I feel like I'm a monster or slowly turning into one. Just hurting everyone around me and getting away with it. 

I'm sick of myself. 

Even though I'm still going to therapy, everything seems so gray. Like there's nothing, no future.

That's why I haven't been active in replying and commenting these days.
I'm sorry. 

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:iconacording:
Acording Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist General Artist
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:iconacording:
Acording Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Hey, just a little Q, on your school what are you following?
The art school here only has CMD
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:iconnagilux:
Nagilux Featured By Owner 6 days ago
im currently like taking a break from school, because of personal issues and all.
but they are aware of my situation so next year i can start the 2nd year over again.

grafish lyceum rotterdam does a ton of educations, but the 1st year is always a general art year, where you do both traditional and digital art
here's the website with all their educations www.glr.nl/ (klik op vormgeven)
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:iconacording:
Acording Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
aww, It's good the school let's you take a break ;A;
i know how it feels to do the second year over again, ;n; it might not be as bad as it looks.

i love it, but, here they say Vormgeving too. but i went to the school.
and they only talked about making websites and codex.
,-, I think i am misunderstanding something here.
why does Limburg suck so much.
Reply
:iconnagilux:
Nagilux Featured By Owner 5 days ago
yeah, its indeed good.
oh, i had to do a year over already like 3 years ago.
its not really bad, but the new people make me so nervous...

hnmm, yeah thats also a part of vormgeving, but i hope they have some other things open.
on glr you can do the website thing too, but i chose not to because its hell to me.
uhh, i have no idea what kind of open day you went to, maybe they have another one?

limburg has the best pie tho
(im sorry but its true ;^; )
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(1 Reply)
:iconacording:
Acording Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
H-Hey mang...w-what about a Contion fursuit...? //u//
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:iconginga-yamori:
Ginga-Yamori Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
hey, sorry for not talking much ;v; how are things?
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:iconnagilux:
Nagilux Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2015
its alright <33

i havent been talking much myself either

things are kinda bad rn, but the therapy is just starting so.. patience eh ;;

how are you?
did people stop being dickbags to you?
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:iconginga-yamori:
Ginga-Yamori Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
yup people finally stopped bothering me omfg

and yeah, therapy is rather rough at the start :c I know it takes a bit before it actually works.  Sometimes you might even have to drop a Therapist to find the right one.

I have been good, much better then I was :'D been kind of trying to enjoy my spring break.
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:iconnagilux:
Nagilux Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2015
omg im glad 
took them a while too...

yeah, im going to have to wait to see if it is anything for me
but so far they seem nice enough.
unlike the social worker i went to before

good to hear :D
i hope you enjoy your spring break
<333
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